New Stuff

So it's been a while. Whatever. I'm probably going to turn into one of those blogs where every other post is an apology for not posting more. Right now, I don't care that much.

Just an update on the life though, a lot of stuff has been changing. There is a lot of stuff that's going on and I see a lot of things starting with brand new beginnings next year. It's good things, really really good things.

Also in this vein, I'm starting this new essay, which may just become an addition to one of my other essays that I haven't put up yet. This is some of the beginning, tell me what you think?

"When I grow up, I want to be popular." That was always my birthday wish, or my wish upon a star, or my blow out this dandelion in one breath wish. To me, being popular was synonymous with being happy. Popularity didn't become an issue for me until I had switched schools and found myself at the bottom of the social ladder. I was out of place, had big glasses, and was extremely socially awkward.
It took a while for me to put a name to the problem. I couldn't figure out why I never talked to anyone during lunch, or why it was always difficult for me to find someone to be partners with during group projects, or why I found myself, on most recesses, walking along the patch of trees that lined the soccer fields by myself, narrating a story where I was interesting and funny and good-looking.
During lunch, after I had finished my meal and talked to no one, I started to observe some common trends. I saw that there were kids who didn't look like they were sitting by themselves. In fact, those kids looked like they were talking to people, had friends and were happy. I then noticed that there were other kids like me who looked very much alone. They did not look like they were talking to anyone else, or had friends, or were happy.
During class, after I had finished reading the selection and finishing the problems (I was usually the first), I began to notice that the same kids who looked like they had friends in the cafeteria, looked like they had friends in the classroom too. They were the kids who always took the longest to finish, but then I noticed it was because they were always talking to someone sitting next to them.
During recess, it all came together. I saw that the same kids who looked happy at lunch and in class, were the ones that always got picked for games or soccer. They were the kids who everyone else wanted to talk too. They were my first physical representation of popularity.

le Blah adorable

The "blah" part of the title is my apology for not posting recently. You'll hear it a lot as I'm irresponsible and have a very guilty conscience, so I should just reinforce now that all apologies and such will quickly become boring.

That being said, the adorable part of the title is for my most recently viewed movie, Amelie! This movie is incredible. Every shot is absolutely gorgeous, and the actors are simply great. The intricacies of the entire world that is created in this Parisian world is outstanding and I love it. I especially love the lead couple, Audrey Tautou and Mathieu Kassovitz. These two are great actors and their characters in this are both hilarious lovable. I know this is a movie that's been around for a while, but if you haven't seen it, make it a priority.

This is Awful - I

From time to time, I come across some things that are simply awful. They can vary from amusing to disgusting, but they are always awful. Now that I have a place to share, I'll be making a point to spread the word about these simply awful items.

This comes from youtube with thanks to the user everythingisterrible.

Hippie Weirdo Yoga Farmers

Cooking Project 1

I'm going to do a longer post about how much I love to cook later. Right now though, I'm going to tell you about my current cooking project. I've been obsessing over eating it lately and I can't wait to try and make some.

MOCHI!

Absurdly colored and deliciously flavored, mochi is one of my true loves. Check out these videos talking about "simple" ways to make them. They are super Asian.

Cooking with Dog
Mochi in 30 Minutes or Less

Cheers,
Sam Tang

My most played song - "Breakable"

I really like this song by Ingrid Michaelson. Her sweet voice is a nice contrast with the harsh subject matter of the actual lyrics...I think. Also, I really like the harmonization in the backing vocals. This song makes me wish I could sing well.

Have you ever thought about what protects our hearts?
Just a cage of rib bones and other various parts
So it's fairly simple to cut right through the mess,
And to stop the muscle that makes us confess

And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys

And you fasten my seat belt because it is the law
In your two ton death trap I finally saw
A piece of love in your face that bathed me in regret
Then you drove me to places I'll never forget

And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys

And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls-
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls-
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys

Written by Ingrid Michaelson

Parry Grip

So...forgot to post yesterday. My bad.

Anyways, for a real quick post, I just thought I'd share some of my favorite links and such. These two videos are a great pick me up anytime I just feel like shit.

Fuzzy Fuzzy Cute Cute
Young Girl Talking About Herself

Cheers,
-Samuel Tang

Protection

Lately, due to volunteering at my church's VBS, I've been working with kids that I've known since they became Americans. They're either kids I've known since they were born, or kids I've known since they immigrated, but in a sense, I've known them since the beginning. And now I see them, and they're older, and bigger, and in positions where I was just a couple of years back. And it's a weird thing, because I've known them for so long, I feel protective of them. They're not my siblings, they're not really my friends either, they're more like my charges, who I've been sent to protect. And I find myself thinking that, surprisingly enough, I really do want to protect them. I want to protect them from harm, from sadness. If someone makes them cry, I want to go and punish him. I want to be a shield from anything that could make them unhappy. I guess it's weird for me to feel that way about them, but I think most of the entire church feels that way too. We've put too much of ourselves into nurturing them and watching them grow to just sit back and let them suffer.

What's weirder though, is what I think may be the reason for the intensity behind my wish. It's because when I was their age, I was suffering like that. I was ridiculed, isolated, and ostracized. And I never want those kids to be in the same position. Maybe it's because I think that if I can protect them from those feelings, I can protect what's left of myself as a child from those same things. But then I think, "Were those so-called 'hard times' really that bad? Haven't you turned out alright?" and I don't know what to feel anymore.

When it all becomes too much to sort through, I come to the conclusion that as long as I can protect their smiles and their joy, I'll continue to be their shield.

July 27th

I have never felt fatter in my life than I have today. For the past three days, I've been having meals where food was pretty much accessible nonstop and I haven't worked out for a week. It's disgusting, but today I was dressed in clothes that I looked really good in. Like, I actually looked really fit. It was a really weird experience. On the one hand, I don't think I've ever felt worse about myself in my life, and on the other hand, I'm looking my best. Somehow, this type of thing has always followed me. When I was younger, and in a lot better shape, I thought I was disgusting and absolutely hated my body, yet apparently I was thought to be extremely hot. And I recently discovered that the general consensus of the female gender is that I'm still quite attractive. I've never thought of myself like that, really, and that was a huge mind fuck for me. So maybe...I'm not as pitiful a person as I really think. Perhaps, I'm not too terrible of a person...physically, mentally, socially, etc.

- Sam Tang

Poladroid - I

I really like Polaroids. The ease with which they could print out pictures was really astounding back in the day. And now that they're so rare, every Polaroid I have is precious, even more so because each Polaroid documented something seemingly precious from my childhood. I think that's why they're so popular now, because they're rare and because seeing something in the format of Polaroid invokes emotions in us that are usually only saved for reminiscence. I think it's because we've made a mental connection between Polaroids and the past that this happens, but, for me at least, anytime I see a Polaroid I get the warm and fuzzy feeling of seeing something from my past.

That being said, I really like this program called Poladroid. I'm sure a lot of people have heard of it, but I only discovered a month or two ago. I'd like to share some of them today, if that's alright.




These guys are some of my fraternity brothers. I love each and every one of them. They have all been a huge influence on my current growth, socially and mentally. They mean the world to me, really. I took these pictures a month or two ago on a trip to California. I think each picture represents each brother well, each in a different aspect of himself that makes him...interesting. From top to bottom, it's G. Devine, L. Carideo, K. Howard-Stone, and E. Ong (there are two pictures of E).

Cheers,

-Wencyien Tang.

Oops

I missed posting on Saturday...crap. One day and I'm already falling behind, sorry guys. Anyways, I do have a good excuse...I was working on the skit for the upcoming Vacation Bible School that I'll be helping out with at ACBC. Yesterday wasn't a total loss though, I hung out with J. Chung, a friend from about eight years ago. It was nice, seeing someone from such a long time ago. I also talked to G. Tan, someone else with whom I've lost touch. Lately it seems that this kind of thing has been happening a lot, I've been getting in better touch with the people that used to be a huge part of my life, who then completely dropped off my radar. It also seems to be coupled with the loss of friends from my recent high school life. Truthfully, I'm not sure that I'm really upset about that either. I know I should regret losing friends that were so important to me in high school, but it just feels as if they had never really been apart of my life. I hope that this doesn't happen to my current friends that I've made in college. I sincerely love them. Well, only the future knows what'll do. And maybe by the time I graduate, I'll have matured enough to keep friends for longer than four years.

- Sam Tang

I love Taylor Swift. I really do. She seems so down to Earth, likable, genuinely talented (in what she does), and absolutely beautiful. Most of my friends know that I have a HUGE celebrity crush on her, but now it's time for the world to know.

Anyways, I never thought I my love of her could ever grow, but it has, thanks to this video.

Plus she raps circles around T-Pain...so, hell yeah!

- Wen Tang

'ello poppet.

Hello everyone, although at this point I'm pretty much talking to myself. Anyways, it's been a long time coming, but I got a blog. I'm hoping that this blog will be able to encompass who I am while it develops. I'll be putting a lot of my written work here, some photography, some links, and a whole lot of everything else. Hopefully I'll be able to do at least one post a day, to ensure that I keep active in something concerning other people besides myself. We'll see what happens though. So thanks for coming, who knows what will happen next.

- Sam Tang